Hello, yes, do walk in, please watch your step that sofa it holds my self-esteem yes a bit in tatters and well, it’s just a cardboard facsimile but only if you look close, no need for that, hurry along now. Here’s the kitchen, all my dreams are in the fridge but the thermostat broke so it’s a bit frozen now, no matter they can thaw if I take them out but what if they thaw and they end up spoilt? Let’s sit at the kitchen now, fancy a cup of sad? I’ve got enough, just right here, oh you like them cold? Not a problem, not a problem we can freeze some for you not a bother I should have a batch I hid behind some of the hope. What? Oh, I would give you some but, well, I like to keep a little of that everywhere for the light now, makes the place smell all nice and bright so I’m a little out at the moment. Oh, right! Let me show you my favorite room. What do you mean you can’t see anything? Look, it’s all books and photos and sometimes a movie or two turn on- what do you mean they’ve faded? Well, yes, they’re a little bit dusty but no need to sniff your nose at it really, a little dusting and it’ll be colourful in no time if I could just find the duster and power on the energy in here because honestly there’s been no time and frankly there’s no point in doing anything with the energy is off and it’s the worst during a blackout but it’ll come back any moment now I’m sure of it. Was working more than fine just a few years ago, really. What? Oh, well, yes. It’s been out for a while. But we’ll do great things again the minute it comes back. Any minute now. I’ll figure it out. Oh! Here’s where I keep the memories. It’s just a bit of a jumble with the filing at the moment but good news is I take a photo of most of them so it’s just a matter of scrambling what the photo was for but great placement really. Also, there’s a lot of the bad ones and they keep pushing the good ones out but I’ve started spring cleaning recently and it’s much better than it used to be, honest. No need to sniff like that I know what it looks like and it can’t be helped, it’s just the way the files were made, if you paid a little more attention. A little less attention on the broken windows though, that was not the intended plan, thank you very much.
Yes, well, have you gotten everything you need? I’m afraid I have to close up shop, yes, right now, not to be rude but you’ve overstayed your welcome just a tad bit, the limbs are all protesting they’re not sure what to do with themselves and I’d like to go to bed now, there’s the door. Please don’t hit the pot of guilt on your way out, it’s done nothing to you and it’s quite sensiti- all right, all right, none of that. This is my mind and I won’t have anyone treating it less than with the utmost respect. Please leave. Good bye.